I Refuse to be a Poop-Flinging Monkey!

Monkeys fling poop when they feel threatened. It's a fact. If you don't believe me, refer to the totally reliable oracle of truth, Wikipedia.




Behold, the Chimp:

Look at him; he's thinking about throwing poop right now.

You would think that millions of years of brain development would elevate the social behaviors of the homo sapien to a level above their cousin, the chimpanzee. But, no, sometimes, humans can be just as dirty as their nearest relative.



I have recently encountered such an individual. For some reason, unknown to me, I have received a little bit of love in the form of an anonymous email that spews some of the foulest insults I have heard in my short life. The immature thing to do here, since I am fairly certain who this "anonymous" sender is (let's just say this isn't the first time she has done something crazy to me or someone else), would be to regress back to her level of maturity and send a spiteful return email, or maybe leave a bag of flaming dog poo on her doorstep, or egg her car, or, or... I don't know; I'm sure there are limitless options for retribution. But I will maintain my dignity and a level of thinking that puts me somewhere above a chimpanzee (but still below the common gerbil ;), and I will choose NOT to digress and become a poop-flinging monkey because, unlike her, I think poop should only be flung in zoos.